I am so tired, part whatever

This has been another banner week for the monsters, for sure...

For the past two weeks, I have had to put in some overnight shifts and then try to sleep during the day. SHE thought it was funny to keep bothering me every afternoon while I attempted to nap--demanding food, drinks or for me to take her to the store to spend money we do not have for frivolities. I maybe got 20 hours over ten days, so I was worn out before all this happened.

HER latest shockwave started over the hair again. SHE has to go back to her original blond and leave it alone so her scalp can heal from all the crap. Since the beginning of the year, there have been more chemicals dumped on her head than I have had in my entire life and that stuff is now damaging her actual scalp. SHE has freaking BALD spots that are completely hairless because I think she killed the follicles.

Now, foolishly, I agreed to a light treatment of pink and green--IF she got back to her blond first. But--she was not to do it till yesterday after an appointment she had. I agreed to the blond lightening only for Thursday night. SHE decided to do it without me and didn't leave the lightener on long enough, which left her hair with an orange tint. Instead of waiting 24 hours to redo the lightener, SHE immediately put the pink and green in. On top of the orange, those colors came out looking like shades of poop. Well, SHE didn't want to go to school looking like that, so she dumped a jar of Manic Panic black all over her head (and down her face, shoulders and onto her body), the bathroom, the towels AND my laundry basket. All the while, her BFF was egging her on via the phone.

When I saw the results, I exploded. I was pissed beyond belief that SHE would do that kind of damage knowing the condition her hair was already in. I wanted to kill her right then and there.

I told her to get off the phone and she refused, running all over the house with it and telling that stupid BFF of hers that I was "hurting" her when ALL I was doing was yelling about the stupidity of her actions. Did I want to beat her? I am not going to lie and say no. Yes--I wanted to spank her and lock her in her room for about an decade at that moment. If you ever heard HER at her Beast-ish worst, you would want to as well out of sheer frustration.

But a new personality mesh has occured: The Beast and Danya have created an alliance that SHE gave a name to--Salome. I have discovered that when a new personality comes out, SHE starts telling everyone that is what she wants to change her name to. So what I was dealing with was actually Salome: all the brute force of The Beast with the pure meaness of Danya.

Anyway, Salome kept on and on about how much she hated me and how evil I am, all the time hitting me and calling me every name in the book. Meanwhile, she would NOT hang up the phone. BFF would not hang up the phone, telling HER that if her mom heard how I talked to HER, the mom would come and "rescue" her from me. This from a family where the second oldest son talks to the mom the same way Danya talks to me and they refuse to make him move out of the house. "Do as I say, not as I do" seems to be the motto over there.

SHE has never gotten her mind wrapped around the fact that people do not air their business in front of guests and so she does not see the drama when it is just family. Yet, SHE insists on broadcasting all of our business through whatever warped filter she uses to make herself look a hero. I am absolutely appalled at some of the boldfaced lies she tells people about what goes on when it is just us.

SHE does not tell them she considers me her servant and never asks for anything--it is always a demand. She tosses her crap all over the floor and then, when she can't find something, accuses me of moving it so she can't find it. Then she tells all her friends I hide/steal her stuff on purpose. There is NEVER an acknowledgement of her own culpibility in the misplacements. It is ALWAYS my fault.

But back to the hair incident...

On top of the damage from the dye, SHE wears these ratty clip-on extensions. With very little hair to hide the tracks and hold the weight, they are dangerous to what hair is left. Yet SHE wears them and thinks no one notices. Well, with the black highlighting the bald areas, it is not hard to see the fakes at all. I asked her to at least lay off the extensions for a few days. That was followed by another assault by Salome. So she went to summer school looking like a cancer patient.

Friday night, after being told NO several times concerning putting cheetah spots over the black, she found some bleach and did it anyway. Ugly enough... BUT then she went back an hour later to the mixture which she had capped and it exploded all over her face, including into her eyes. Would you believe Salome said it was my fault for that, as well? Again, BFF on the phone encouraging her to do the stupid $h!t!!! I tried to help her with the cleaning up and flushing her eyes, but she again started screaming I was hurting her on purpose. OMFG!!! I was trying to keep her from going blind and she's telling people I am hurting her!

It didn't get any better yesterday. Even though BFF knew I had planned to take HER to see the new "Harry Potter" movie today, she invited HER to go with her family yesterday. Of course, she accepted knowing how much it would hurt my feelings. Except, according to her, I have no feelings at all except anger because I will not cry in front of her. Why would I? That would only give her more ammo. I let her go, but made sure BFF's mother knew I was not happy. I also made sure I sprung the little sleepover plan on her because they lied about her knowing before SHE got in the car. That way, another parent was going to have to know my pain. Childish? Of course! But the mom has her own issues that I am going to be addressing with her.

SHE likes to tell me that all her friends are afraid of me because I yell at her. SHE never tells her friends that she is a little terror and deserves every word and more. I don't care that they don't like me. I am not fond of drug-taking, shoplifting, sexually active little turdblossoms who run the streets all night because their parents are either too drunk to care or not ever home to know. I WANT them to be afraid of me because I want my child to see what happens when a parent doesn't give a damn about their kids.

Now, BFF's mom (aka Mommy K)--there's a winner. I like the woman somewhat, but she has her own issues.

She is a cancer survivor and is still dealing with the aftermath, so she has gone all new-age on her family. Chakras and auras and homeopathic medicines for everyone is her answer to all woes. BFF has a twin with some of the same issues as SHE does--mom's answer? Vitimins and burning candles. I am not sure the girl is getting meds or therapy. I doubt it because she is quite withdrawn and spends as much time away from the rest of the household as possible. The oldest boy joined the Army as soon as he could. The next son is a clone of HER. Same symptoms and actions, but with no control--the irony is that SHE thinks it is so sad that the 2nd son talks to his mom the way SHE talks to me, but cannot make the connection about how it is no different than how she talks to me. The husband is a non-entity, but stays there because they cannot afford to get divorced in this economy. I gather Mommy K sleeps in one or the other of the girls' room because hubby took over the master bedroom.

Now Mommy K fills my daughter's head full of crap when she is over there. One thing that really pisses me off is BFF constantly telling MY kid that her mom would come and take HER if she heard me yelling at her. I am also pissed that the woman tells my kid that I am too "aggressive" for her and I need therapy, not her. Seriously? This from a woman who has a completely disfunctional house, kids who are either running away or abusing her, and one who will most likely be the one to get knocked up or end up in jail because she is ignored in favor of BFF who is an honor roll student and a cheerleader (and a liar).

Am I aggressive*? In the sense that I am boldly assertive and forward, yes. That I expect the best effort and that I am forceful and enterprising as well as " vigorously energetic, esp. in the use of initiative and forcefulness"--also yes. In the sense that I am "characterized by or tending toward unprovoked offensives, attacks, invasions, or the like; militant forward or menacing"--well that is bullsmack. That would be HER. I have been told over and over that I have to be like a drill sargeant with HER because SHE needs to have exacting order in her life so that her internal friends don't get a chance to make poor decisions due to lack of control.

Meanwhile, SHE is still over at Mommy K's knowing that she has all the summer school homework to get done before Tuesday or she will flunk that, too. No work permit and she will have to take math again with the same teacher who screwed her over this past year... She knows, maybe she cares someplace in there (Krissy and Elly might care, maybe even Abby), but Salome thinks "she" is invincible and is like the red-hot poker behind the eyes goading HER to the worst.

Can anyone truly fault me for looking forward to HER being gone for almost two weeks? I freakin' need the rest!


*Definitions from Dictionary.com

Just another day in purgatory

For a while it seemed things were getting better, then POW! The Beast comes out in the worst places and at the worst times. Today, it was at the mall. "Krissy" decided the neighbor girl she used to be friends with needed a makeover. So off to the mall we went--ostensibly to seek out less manly clothes for the young lady.

Two minutes after we walked into a particularly favorite store of most of the Crew, Krissy had a pile of stuff she wanted me to buy for her. I was about to sort it out when she announced that she had promised to buy some crap thing for a friend of hers. SHE had promised to buy with MY money!!! Um... No. I told her that if she insisted I buy something for some person I loathe because she "promised already" then she could not have the things she wanted for herself because my budget is already stretched too thin. That was the last I saw of Krissy. The Beast emerged and decided to become obnoxious, loud and profane in her response to the compromise offered. She also lashed out physically again, punching me in the breasts because some idiot told her that hitting a breast can cause cancer. And, yes--I jerked her around after that and should have beaten her butt in public, mental illness or not. But The Beast knows where she has a sympathetic audience and chooses her forums carefully. I would have been in handcuffs before the first swat on the behind.

I just took the friend and left to show her some other stores that might be more to her taste. The Beast followed us and screamed at me to "get back in there NOW", this followed by her grabbing my bag so hard she broke the straps. It was all I took not to toss her over the side of the balcony.

The Beast stayed around for most of the afternoon, causing issues all along the way--cursing at me, slapping and otherwise being as ugly as possible.

It took nearly an hour before Danya emerged just long enough to tell me that the promised item was for a birthday present. Had I been presented with that information to begin with, my reaction would have been far different. But I cannot stand being told by a child that I "WILL" do anything. Once I knew it was a birthday present, I had no issue with buying the item in question. However, it does mean no extras for the rest of the week. The Beast, Danya and Krissy do not understand the concept of a budget--they all actually commented that I could use a credit card or one of my debit cards because I need to buy them what they ask for.

In two weeks, the Crew is going back home to visit family for a long week. I am so looking forward to a break. From them, from the lowlife "friends", from the stress...

Those damned "friends" have discovered The Beast will cooperate with them and so they call her to ask me for rides, for money, for other stuff their own parents cannot get for them. They use her for what they can get out of her and steal what she won't willingly give them. In fact, just a little while ago, the neighbor saw someone trying to go into her bedroom. Luckily, she woke up and whoever it was took off. But the mere fact someone tried to come into our house pisses me off. I have no doubt that it was one of those lowlifes attempting to steal her clothes or something. Now waiting for the cops... That ought to take about three hours.